Lost my virginity to my teacher.

I am 17 years old, in grade 12, and for the past month I have had a sexual relationship with my 34-year-old teacher. It started because my family has been having problems lately, and I asked if I could talk to him about it. He was always my favorite teacher and I preferred him to any of the guidance counselors at my school, and he even once overheard me mention that I thought he was attractive (which I do). I don’t remember what happened or exactly what was said, but that first night when I stayed after class we ended up having sex twice before I left. It wasn’t rape since I didn’t say no to him, but I feel like he took advantage of me. I don’t know how to stop it, we have sex almost daily now and I am afriad of what he will do to me if I say no to him, he has already threatened me several times. And if I were to go to the police, wouldn’t they just say it is consensual since I am of age and leave it at that? I don’t know what to do. I don’t trust anyone anymore and I can hardly stand to be in the same room as anyone in authority without breaking down. He knows very well that this is not the sort of relationship I want with him, but it doesn’t matter. I go to him before class, or after class, or during my spare, or sometimes all three. I feel stupid and cowardly about the fact that I keep going back to him, but I am afriad that he will hurt me (he has hit me once). I know I should tell someone, but my parents would just say that it is my own fault, they both grew up in very traditional families. Either way, I know that this is going to have negative effects on me for a long time. Should I just deal with it until graduation? Because where I’m standing, I don’t see many alternatives.

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